The harder they fall

We hiked up to Devil's Bathtub in Spearfish Canyon today. It's a trail I've gone up many times, a little sketchy in spots but nothing too treacherous. Usually. We've had one of the wettest springs on record and the path crosses the creek several times. It usually isn't a big deal because it's not much more than a trickle. But because of the moisture, today it was rushing.

The end destination of the trail is a series of rock "slides" (not the kind you would want to slide down) draining into and out of a large rock pool. My aunt Barbie, cousin Lisa and I made it to the basin, and were crossing one last time to grab a spot to sit and enjoy the views. Barbie and I made it across just fine, but Lisa was stuck on the other side with Cooper, our dog. He's not the best swimmer and was kind of fussing around, not wanting to try and swim where there was current and he couldn't touch the bottom. Lisa put his leash on so at least I would be able to sort of tow him across and keep him from sliding down the 20 feet of rock slides out of the basin. But the dog was spazzing out, and I totally thought Lisa was going to get knocked off the narrow ledge and go sliding down herself. So I kind of lost my cool (and my footing) and faceplanted right in the rocks and current. Barbie, luckily, grabbed my shirt and kept ME from heading down the rock slide headfirst (not kidding, that would have been a concussion scenario AT BEST). When I scrambled out of the water at first I just felt frozen, but as I thawed out I noticed my forearm, wrist and elbow were pretty sore. It became more evident trying to navigate back down the steep path to the trailhead. I've never had a broken bone, but I though for sure that's what I was dealing with today; it was just so sore and couldn't support any weight. But, alas, a trip to the emergency room later and I'm lucky (?) to just have a sprain and some bruises. I should really invest in a helmet - like, to wear around every day. I'm such a klutz. But I must say, it was a nice hike -- and the arm isn't anything some ice and Advil won't cure.

Some pics my husband was taking downstream while I was flailing around up top ...




This is what I would have fallen down. The pool is above these rapids, at the top left of the photo.

Babies Schmabies

I know the rules. Taking a month and a half between blog posts isn't ideal, but it happens. Oops. Life is busy. So, let's try this again ...

Last weekend we went to Colorado to see our new (first) baby niece. She is Ava and she is tiny and expressive and beautiful. And that led to the inevitable - the baby fevah. We've sort of been thinking about it for a while now - this summer was always when we planned to start trying. After all, we have a house, have been together for six years, have good family support, have stable jobs, etc.

But I'm SUCH a neurotic planner, and it's getting me into trouble. I spent all week working and reworking the finances, trying to fit what I think a baby will cost into the spreadsheet. We have a unique problem in that we have a basement apartment in our house, the rent from which covers about half the mortgage payment. But with a baby, we just can't fit on one level of the house like we do now (barely). So we'd lose a big chunk of income and gain a wrinkly little expenditure. We could do it, but barely. And that's scares the shit out of me. Because in my head and on my spreadsheets, I have the best-case scenario as us barely scraping by. So what if something isn't best-case? What if the baby has special needs? What if the water heater explodes? What if we have triplets? There are a thousand things I can't control, and I want to be able to provide for the thousand things I can, relatively comfortably.

But maybe that's part of it. Maybe kids can be so rewarding because it's SO scary. I always thought it was the loss of youth that gave first-time parents cold feet - no more partying, no more indulging, no more bad decisions. But I'm beginning to think it's bigger than that. It's truly the first time, at least for me, that I will be an adult. Really, truly. There's no bail-out for this. Because you become someone else's bailiff, for better or worse.

I guess all that's left is to take the leap, and hope for the best.